Wanting Wisdom

 

 I bought the bracelet pictured above when I was in Dallas last weekend.

The glass beads are made by a man named Simon out of recycled glass from bottles found in his village in Kenya. I loved buying such an unique piece - especially one with a great story behind it.
There were several different bracelets with varying colored beads and words. I selected WISDOM because I need a reminder to ask for it everyday, and I chose the multi-colored beads to represent the different areas of my life that I specifically need to pray for wisdom

 

 

Wanting wisdom. It is the desire of my heart and it is pressing me on all sides.

I cry out for it because I know I need it.

 

A dear friend of mine has reminded me on several occasions that when I don't know what to do I should ask God for wisdom because that is a prayer He loves to answer.

 

"If you need wisdom, ask our generous God,

and He will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking."

James 1:5

I'm going to be honest, I've been giving God the cold shoulder a little the last couple of weeks. The limbo-esque nature of my life has been getting me down and frustrated and I've been taking it out on Him. He can handle it, but I'm the one who suffers when I do this...I know it, yet I do it anyway. Dumb human. I know He's up to something, but the control freak in me wants to know all the details RIGHT NOW.

 

But, I'm learning that faith doesn't look like that.

Why do I need faith - believing in something I can not see - if I already know what's gonna happen?

 

In an effort to make amends for being huffy, to ease my conscience at least, I made an effort to finish setting up my prayer closet this weekend. I need a quiet retreat, a corner to cry in, a peaceful place to pray. I woke up earlier than my alarm this morning and decided to climb on in there and try it out.

I prayed for friends, I read some devotional thoughts and scripture (a lot of which had something to with waiting on God's provision and trusting in His pace - how timely, and so not coincidental), I also asked for forgiveness and wisdom. I read through a passage of scripture I have posted in that quiet place that has been following me around for the past year:

 

"I pray that from His glorious, unlimited resources He will empower you with inner strength through His Spirit. Then Christ will make His home in your hearts as you trust in Him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now all glory to God, who is able, through His mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen."

Ephesians 3:16-21 

 

I went to church this morning in need of a good word.

 God does not disappoint me when He knows I'm looking and longing for Him.

The opening passage was from Habakkuk 3:17-19:

 

"Even though the fig trees have no blossoms,
    and there are no grapes on the vines;
even though the olive crop fails,
    and the fields lie empty and barren;
even though the flocks die in the fields,
    and the cattle barns are empty,yet I will rejoice in the Lord!
    I will be joyful in the God of my salvation! The Sovereign Lord is my strength!
    He makes me as surefooted as a deer,
    able to tread upon the heights."

 

Even though life is rough and bad things happen - YET I WILL REJOICE!

 

Then Pastor Craig began his sermon (he's STILL in Ecclesiastes, but apparently that's where he needed to be for me to get God's good word today).

 

He started out by stating that true wisdom knows it can't know everything. So as I've prayed for wisdom and gotten ticked at God for not giving me full disclosure, I wasn't being wise, I was being pushy. Some of what God has up His sleeve is hidden for a reason and I shouldn't demand to know it all, because in there is no room for real faith if my future is fully certain. My faith and trust in God doesn't come from certainty and clarity in all the details, it comes from the confidence I place in God that says "I know You've got me. I know what You've told me. I know You've got this".

 

Trusting an unknown future to a known God.

 

For the benediction Pastor Craig read Ephesians 3:16-21,

 the very passage I had read through and meditated on in my closet this morning! 

 I almost chuckled out loud but caught myself because no body but God would get the irony. 

 

And then it all came together. The only wisdom I really need is the knowledge of  how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. Because truly understanding the love God has for me will wipe away any uncertainty, any fear, any anxiousness I have about my future. God loves me BIG, He's not going to leave me and He can accomplish infinitely more than I might ask or think.

 

How exciting!